Assertiveness Therapy
People vary greatly in their styles of exerting and accepting influence on and from others.
Dr. Chafetz often describes a continuum stretching from PASSIVITY on one end, to ASSERTIVENESS in the middle, to AGGRESSIVENESS on the other end.
Passive individuals accept influence from others as commands. They follow others' commands obediently, and neglect their own preferences in life. Few passive individuals are fully content.
Aggressive individuals strive forcefully to impose their preferences on others. They disregard others' rights to their own preferences, and others' unpleasant feelings when the aggressive person fails to respect them. Aggressive people are experienced as unpleasant by others.
Assertive individuals clearly communicate to others, through word and deed, what they want for themselves and what they expect of others, as well as what they are and are not willing to do. Assertive individuals respect the rights and preferences of others, and negotiate in a courteous spirit of mutual respect. They can say, when necessary, that the item at hand is NOT their problem. They speak in polite and business-like tones, without sarcasm or recrimination.
Assertiveness is the preferred style. It leads to greater contentment for the person, and more pleasurable interactions with others.
Dr. Chafetz helps clients learn assertiveness skills, thus moving away from both passivity and aggressiveness.
Dr. Chafetz often describes a continuum stretching from PASSIVITY on one end, to ASSERTIVENESS in the middle, to AGGRESSIVENESS on the other end.
Passive individuals accept influence from others as commands. They follow others' commands obediently, and neglect their own preferences in life. Few passive individuals are fully content.
Aggressive individuals strive forcefully to impose their preferences on others. They disregard others' rights to their own preferences, and others' unpleasant feelings when the aggressive person fails to respect them. Aggressive people are experienced as unpleasant by others.
Assertive individuals clearly communicate to others, through word and deed, what they want for themselves and what they expect of others, as well as what they are and are not willing to do. Assertive individuals respect the rights and preferences of others, and negotiate in a courteous spirit of mutual respect. They can say, when necessary, that the item at hand is NOT their problem. They speak in polite and business-like tones, without sarcasm or recrimination.
Assertiveness is the preferred style. It leads to greater contentment for the person, and more pleasurable interactions with others.
Dr. Chafetz helps clients learn assertiveness skills, thus moving away from both passivity and aggressiveness.
